Why would I shoulder the blame? Like I said, I can handle being hated. It's something we're taught. As an assassin, you're going to encounter people who hate you for what you do. So it's something I'm uniquely equipped for.
[Also he's killed so many more people indirectly by causing the disease.... So.]
I mean, realistically I think I'll convince them we should come clean!
But in the unlikely scenario that they refuse, I don't mind. It might be better, even, then everyone would still have no reason to distrust the other three and continue to work with them.
[ That won't happen, McGillis thinks and doesn't say. Not truly for Yugamu's sake, or so he thinks to himself, but because there is no reason the other three should be able to hide in their hypocrisy and corruption forever.
But saying that now would just make Yugamu double down, and that serves no purpose. ]
I never thought I'd say such a thing about you, but... You're truly a pure soul.
[ Is that a compliment? Maybe. McGillis himself can't be sure. ]
I know my cute face is disarming, but you know that even if you discount my nebulously real assassination victims, I've still killed countless people fighting the Futurans, right? It takes me mere moments to put myself in the headspace where I can snuff out a life without a care.
It wouldn't hurt right now anyway so it'd be less fun.
[Anyway.]
But still, I'm fascinated by your assessment. Most people call me disturbed, twisted, insane, sick, perverted, all sorts of things in that vein, you know?
[ He's got his own unique view of the world, but he's proud owner of some measure of common sense. Yugamu is absolutely a pervert freak. ]
It makes the purity with which you view the world and others all the more fascinating.
[ To stop being an assassin because you only want to love... It's completely insane. It defies the logic McGillis lived his life by. But it also can't have been an easy conclusion to reach and McGillis can see the will behind it. Is it all just a result of the simulated life, he wonders? Is Yugamu unreal because he was made to be?
He pauses and uncrosses his arms, pushing off the shelf he'd been leaning against to look at Yugamu head-on. At this point, the question is just idle curiousity, but... ]
What kind of person do I seem to be, in that pure view of yours?
[He still doesn't understand but at least now he knows McGillis isn't having some sort of mental breakdown or something. He fixes his attention on the question because it's a lot easier to wrap his mind around.]
You remind me a bit of Kurara, actually. You both have the bearing of someone from a upper class family, proud and easy to get a rise out of. But under that you're both actually kind, and I imagine a loyal friend to the few that earn the right for you to consider such.
That said, Kurara's outbursts are a lot more... Well she's a teenager, so you can imagine. You seem a lot more repressed as much as you also seem more reasonable. I think it'd be far worse when you finally snapped than her fearsome right hook.
[ Mhm. That's a reasonable assessment of McGillis as he presents himself. He does take some amount of offense to being easy to get a rise of, but it's true that Yugamu has caught him off his game more often than not here.
It's a relief to hear that despite all the missteps he's made here, he hasn't damaged his facade too much. Whatever he has bared of himself hasn't been taken the wrong way - or the right one. He can see without being seen. ]
[ While there is nothing about Yugamu's view of him that McGillis considers all that accurate, this one... Hm. It amuses him the most, at the very least. ]
I see. I hope for your sake that you'll get front row seats when I do lose my restraints.
[ A joke, of course. And after a beat: ]
You're pure because none of the blood that has flowed over your hands has dulled your ability to see the best in others and desire a brighter future. Your kindness is a choice that I cannot fathom one would make. Take that as you will.
[Yugamu was about to say something about how he looks forward to it (only because it will be sexy), but then finally the explanation.]
I think it comes back to my family. Steeped in death as we were, we needed to make sure to support each other. Even if my recollection of it was originally fictional, my memories of growing up in a house of people that loved each other, a family that held my blood stained hands in theirs... I think that's what gives me the strength to be who I am.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[Also he's killed so many more people indirectly by causing the disease.... So.]
no subject
And the rest of them cannot? They're so fragile that you'd take the fall for them, despite their sin weighing as heavy as you think your own does?
no subject
But in the unlikely scenario that they refuse, I don't mind. It might be better, even, then everyone would still have no reason to distrust the other three and continue to work with them.
no subject
But saying that now would just make Yugamu double down, and that serves no purpose. ]
I never thought I'd say such a thing about you, but... You're truly a pure soul.
[ Is that a compliment? Maybe. McGillis himself can't be sure. ]
no subject
I know my cute face is disarming, but you know that even if you discount my nebulously real assassination victims, I've still killed countless people fighting the Futurans, right? It takes me mere moments to put myself in the headspace where I can snuff out a life without a care.
no subject
[ He smiles, teeth showing a little. He means this. ]
Do not take this to mean I am not angry at you.
no subject
Of course not. I still think you'd feel better if you hit me a little about it.
[Is this the pure soul you were talking about.]
no subject
[ NO, this part is... we put up with it. ]
no subject
[Anyway.]
But still, I'm fascinated by your assessment. Most people call me disturbed, twisted, insane, sick, perverted, all sorts of things in that vein, you know?
no subject
[ He's got his own unique view of the world, but he's proud owner of some measure of common sense. Yugamu is absolutely a pervert freak. ]
It makes the purity with which you view the world and others all the more fascinating.
[ To stop being an assassin because you only want to love... It's completely insane. It defies the logic McGillis lived his life by. But it also can't have been an easy conclusion to reach and McGillis can see the will behind it. Is it all just a result of the simulated life, he wonders? Is Yugamu unreal because he was made to be?
He pauses and uncrosses his arms, pushing off the shelf he'd been leaning against to look at Yugamu head-on. At this point, the question is just idle curiousity, but... ]
What kind of person do I seem to be, in that pure view of yours?
no subject
You remind me a bit of Kurara, actually. You both have the bearing of someone from a upper class family, proud and easy to get a rise out of. But under that you're both actually kind, and I imagine a loyal friend to the few that earn the right for you to consider such.
That said, Kurara's outbursts are a lot more... Well she's a teenager, so you can imagine. You seem a lot more repressed as much as you also seem more reasonable. I think it'd be far worse when you finally snapped than her fearsome right hook.
no subject
It's a relief to hear that despite all the missteps he's made here, he hasn't damaged his facade too much. Whatever he has bared of himself hasn't been taken the wrong way - or the right one. He can see without being seen. ]
'When' instead of 'if'?
no subject
[Said with the tone of "surely you didn't actually need me to tell you this." Like it should be obvious.]
no subject
I see. I hope for your sake that you'll get front row seats when I do lose my restraints.
[ A joke, of course. And after a beat: ]
You're pure because none of the blood that has flowed over your hands has dulled your ability to see the best in others and desire a brighter future. Your kindness is a choice that I cannot fathom one would make. Take that as you will.
no subject
I think it comes back to my family. Steeped in death as we were, we needed to make sure to support each other. Even if my recollection of it was originally fictional, my memories of growing up in a house of people that loved each other, a family that held my blood stained hands in theirs... I think that's what gives me the strength to be who I am.